When we moved in together, neither of us could have predicted that these kids sitting down for dinner together would be twice as loud a year later. We thought it might get a little louder…50% maybe? But literally twice as loud? That was far too terrible to imagine.
Still stalling, delaying entering into the fray as long as humanly possible, I looked at Maggie and said, “I’m just glad I’m so much smarter than you.” (Anyone who knows us knows that statement is patently false in almost every instance, but for this one, tiny moment in time, it was definitely true.) She raised an eyebrow at me in an unspoken, “How do you figure?” while I casually sipped my wine and said, “I kept my wine glass in here when we were putting the drinks on the table. You have to go out there if you want your beer.” She sighed heavily, dropped her head in defeat and carried some pasta into the dining room. I took another sip of my wine and followed her.
Dinner tonight was the usual bedlam of amusing stories that couldn’t possibly wait another minute to be shared, dilemmas that begged for brainstorming from the group, planning for the week and a grievance or two that needed airing – none of it happening with an economy of words or consistently appropriate “inside voices.” Dinner at the Crandler house is not for sissies.
According to Ben, the Crandlers have lived together in this house exactly one year today (I didn’t verify this fact, but it is Ben we’re talking about, so confirmation is probably not necessary). Living in a house with four kids and two moms most certainly makes for more noise, mess and chaos, but also more support, camaraderie, opportunities and fun. And most importantly, more friendship and love. No matter what the future may hold for the Crandlers, we’re family now. And a house with two moms will always have been the best idea ever.
After dinner, Maggie having cooked, I began to do the dishes as the kids cleared. I sighed heavily, pushed hair out of my face with my forearm, pulled out my very best, I’m-so-terribly-put-upon face and said, “Now y’all get out of here and let me do these dishes. It’s a really big job – might take me a while.” So they left me alone with my thoughts and my dishes, almost managing to look a little sheepish at the thought of all that work ahead of me.
A full year later and they still don’t know I actually like doing the dishes. Nobody tell them, OK?
I distinctly remember this picture. However, I must admit, YOU have come so far in this past year. I see children who have matured, a friendship which has flourished, and a living arrangement some of us are envious of for the obvious reasons. But, if I am being totally honest, what I see more than anything is the look in your eyes one year later. You have seen so many positive changes since this photo was taken. I have to admit, also, that I think it is a SOMEONE who has given you that new light in your eyes. The hope that you can achieve anything you want has been validated by this certain someone. I would like to think I had something to do with this change. Lori, what you have with the Crandler Clan is beautiful and fabulous. I think that BOTH you and Mary are truly blessed.
ReplyDeleteIn a smackdown, my money is on the Crandler-Harden Heagler clan vs. Kate and Ally. Plus, you're a lot more interesting.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that the two of you have NOT killed each other or done the passive-aggressive "i hate you" dirty deeds after a year (yes, I'm sure Ben is right. Who would question that?)proves that this works. Duh. I am SO happy that, at the time in your life when you felt such despair & helplessness/hopelessness, things have OF COURSE turned WAY better than you could have ever imagined. Great job, ladies!!!!!!!! xxoo
ReplyDelete